Paul Revere by Cyrus Dallin, North End, Boston

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Monday, January 5, 2009

THE 12 LABORS OF BARACK H. OBAMA




Barack H. Obama will be sworn in as the 44th President of the United States in 15 days.

Thinking about that event led me to think about the daunting tasks that lie ahead of him.
He’s entering the Oval Office at one of the most tumultuous points in modern history—involvement in two wars in the Middle East [our troops are still in Iraq, and so that occupation has not ended], an economic crisis that hasn’t yet peaked, and promises to worsen, high unemployment, bankruptcies, the greed and scandals of Wall Street, the Bernie Madow scandal, our infrastructure crumbling, climate change, education failures, a recalcitrant opposition party that has some of its people already setting up an “Impeach Obama” website before he’s done anything as president.
I can’t help but think of the 12 Labors of Hercules and parallel them with what President-elect Obama faces. In my list, King Eurystheus symbolizes the American people, and I have abstracted some of the monsters he faces and represent them as institutions, geographical locations, groups of people, etc.. I have approached some of the beasts that must be “slain” with a sense of humor [conservative politicians, personalities, etc., and, of course, do not really wish death—just ignominy—for them—it’s all in political good fun.
I can’t imagine anyone of good heart and who calls herself/himself a concerned citizen not wishing this man well as he faces such monstrous problems.

One: Kill the Nemean Lion (The Middle East)

This monster of a lion had a hide that was so tough no arrow could pierce it. Hercules stunned the beast with his olive-wood club and then strangled it with his bare hands. It is said that he skinned the lion, using the lion's sharp claws, and ever after wore its hide.

I see this formidable beast as the Middle East, and the slaying of the Nemean Lion as a metaphor for the hatred and continued warring among the nations there. Let us hope he can, if not “kill” those centuries old habits, at least tame the beast.


Two: Kill the Lernean Hydra (The Terrorists Who Wish US Further Harm)
The evil, snakelike Hydra had nine heads. If one got hurt, two would grow in its place. But Hercules quickly sliced off the heads, while his charioteer, Iolaus, sealed the wounds with a torch. Hercules made his arrows poisonous by dipping them in the Hydra's blood.

Three: Capture the Cerynian Hind (The American Economy)
The goddess Artemis loved and protected this stubborn little deer, which had gold horns. Hercules found it a challenge to capture the delicate hind without hurting it (and making Artemis angry). After following the hind for an entire year, he safely carried it away.

Our economy could certainly be called “delicate” at this point, and I don’t need to explain the “gold horns.” Obama will certainly have to “capture the delicate hind/economy without hurting it.

Four: Capture the Erymanthian Boar (Richard Bruce Cheney)
The people of Mount Erymanthus lived in fear of this deadly animal. Hercules chased the wild boar up the mountain and into a snowdrift. He then took it in a net and brought it to King Eurystheus, who was so frightened of the beast that he hid in a huge bronze jar.
Once he’s out of office, Dick Cheney will no longer terrorize the American people. We can all leave our bronze jars of fear and cheer his departure.

Five: Clean the Augean Stables (The Bush Administration and Republican rule)
Thousands of cows lived in these stables belonging to King Augeas. They had not been cleaned in 30 years, but Hercules was told to clean them completely in a single day. To do so he made two rivers bend so that they flowed into the stables, sweeping out the filth.

This is the most apt metaphor of the mess that will be left behind by this malAdministration. Obama, alas, has only the Potomac to help flush away the effluvia.


Six: Kill the Stymphalian Birds (Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, Ann Coulter, Charles Krauthammer, and many, many more)

These murderous birds lived around Lake Stymphalos. Their claws and beaks were sharp as metal and their feathers flew like darts. Hercules scared them out of their nests with a rattle and then killed them with the poison arrows he had made from the Hydra's blood.

Sharp as metal indeed, and not just their feathers that flew like darts—their words.




Seven: Capture the Cretan Bull (Rush Limbaugh)

This savage bull, kept by King Minos of Crete, was said to be insane and breathe fire. Hercules wrestled the mad beast to the ground and brought it back to King Eurystheus. Unfortunately, the king set it free, and it roamed Greece, causing terror wherever it went.

Remember: King Eurystheus represents the American people, and Greece here, represents America. Alas. We may never be rid of this Cretan Bull.


Eight: Capture the Horses of Diomedes (Rupert Murdock and the Conservative Media)

King Diomedes, leader of the Bistones, [Sounds like a 1960s rock and roll band] fed his bloodthirsty horses on human flesh. Hercules and his men fought and killed King Diomedes and fed the king to his horses. This made the horses tame, so that Hercules was able to lead them to King Eurystheus.

A tamed conservative media?

Nine: Take the Girdle of the Amazon Queen Hippolyte (Hillary Clinton)
Hercules went to the land of the Amazons, [No. Not to buy books and electronics] where the queen welcomed him and agreed to give him her girdle for Eurystheus's daughter. But Hera spread the rumor that Hercules came as an enemy. In the end he had to conquer the Amazons and steal the golden belt.
Alas, Hercules/Obama took the Girdle of Inevitability away from Hillary. Now she will be at his side to carry out her mission.


Ten: Capture the Cattle of Geryon (Mitch McConnell, John Boehner, the head of the RNC)

Geryon, a winged monster with three human bodies, had a herd of beautiful red cattle. He guarded his prized herd with the help of a giant and a vicious two-headed dog. Hercules killed Geryon, the giant, and the dog and brought the cattle to King Eurystheus.

The metaphor here is that McConnell, Boehner and the head of the RNC all try to keep the “beautiful red cattle” under their control. The two-headed dog? That remains to be seen as to who will wield the minority power in the next Congress.

Eleven: Take the Golden Apples of the Hesperides (The Good Opinion of the American People)
The Hesperides were nymphs. In their garden grew golden apples protected by Ladon, a dragon with a hundred heads. Hercules struck a bargain with Atlas, who held up the earth. Hercules shouldered the earth while Atlas, the nymphs' father, fetched the apples.

With the help of the people he has chosen to serve with him, President-elect Obama will gather the good opinion of the American people, and hold it like an arm full of golden apples.


Twelve: Capture Cerberus (The Energy Crisis, Global Climate Change, and Growing US Unemployment)

Hercules was ordered to capture Cerberus, the three-headed guard dog of the underworld, without using weapons. Hercules wrestled down the dog's wild heads, and it agreed to go with him to King Eurystheus. Cerberus was soon returned unharmed to the underworld.

25 comments:

dmarks said...

Are 6,7,8 in some vague way a request for censorship of these dissenting voices?

I never knew Hercules was so thin skinned that one of his labors was to crush those who called him names.

If a "Hero" seeks to crush dissent, that is not very heroic. People like Hugo Chavez seek to "tame" the media.

Shaw Kenawe said...

dmarks!

I said at the beginning of the post that this was in jest.

As for squelching dissent--which political group came up with the label "Liberal Media?"

Also, you're imputing to "Hercules/Obama" what MY ideas are for his 12 tasks, not his.

We do need opposition, what we don't need are people calling for Obama's impreachment before he's president.

THAT is the mentality I'm railing against.

The mentality that Limbaugh employed just recently--that somehow the Democrats arranged the economic meltdown so that John McCain would lose the election.

That kind of paranoia lunacy encourages Limbaugh's listeners to believe that the loss had nothing to do with 8 years of Bush administration. That kind of paranoia blames everyone but the real losers.

Thoughtful criticism is encouraged and needed in a democracy.

Crazy paranoia and hate-mongering is NOT thoughtful criticism.

Coulter is another example of crazy. She disagreed with a Supreme Court Justice, so she suggest someone put rat poison in his food--and that's an example of one of her more moderate rants.

dmarks said...

"As for squelching dissent--which political group came up with the label "Liberal Media?"

What does one have to do with the other? Identifying something has nothing to do with silencing it.

"Thoughtful criticism is encouraged and needed in a democracy....Crazy paranoia and hate-mongering is NOT thoughtful criticism."

Except, too often, the term "crazy" or "hate-mongering" is used primarily for those on "the other side".

I don't like Coulter. But I would not silence her. We need more voices, not fewer.

Shaw Kenawe said...

Not all "voices" are equal.

People who use hate and divisive language then want to be taken seriously as political thinkers don't deserve my respect.

And I'll continue to marginalize them.

Sure they can say what they want--to a certain extent--but they also have to take responsibility for whatever their words encourage in the weak minded and paranoid.

Left and Right.

I've read on some conservative blogs that if Barack Obama is sworn into office on January 20 without producing what THEY have determined is a legal birth certificate, there will be blood to pay.

Here's the text:

Finally, if 1/20/09 comes and goes with a usurper in the Whitehouse (that is, Obama is definitely NOT an Article II “natural born citizen” -- dad Kenyan/British citizen at BHO’s birth -- albeit he MAY be a 14th Amendment “citizen”) with usurper enablers in Congress and the Supreme Court … God help us because many of the people will -- rightfully and under our Constitution and Declaration of Independence -- endeavor through other means to take back the Government from what is nothing less than a non-constitutional coup d’etat. (SCOTUS now does have the power to forestall that grim yet inevitable scenario, otherwise the blood and possible loss of our Constitutional Republic is SQUARELY ON THEIR HEADS.)

You get some weak-minded sociopath whacko who internalizes that, and some real serious crimes can result.

Even free speech and criticism has its limits--just ask the Secret Service about it.

dmarks said...

"People who use hate and divisive language then want to be taken seriously as political thinkers don't deserve my respect."

As long as you are equally condemning of those on the other side (and there are plenty) who do this also.

"but they also have to take responsibility for whatever their words encourage in the weak minded and paranoid."

Only if they actualy encourage such actions. Such as call for someone's assasination.

"I've read on some conservative blogs that if Barack Obama is sworn into office on January 20 without producing what THEY have determined is a legal birth certificate, there will be blood to pay."

I also remember a few years ago (probably during the heat of the vs Kerry campaign) there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush. Not a lot, not everywhere, but even if it appears a few places, it is too much.

And yes, the quote you provide does refer to bloodshed (even though Limbaugh, Hannity, etc don't). I think that crosses a line.

But as for "what we don't need are people calling for Obama's impreachment before he's president.
THAT is the mentality I'm railing against.", I find nothing at all wrong with calling for impeachment, on either side, whether or not I agree with what they say. It is no where near calling for blood.

Shaw Kenawe said...

dmarks,

How can you say there's nothing wrong with calling for impeachment BEFORE Obama's even in office????

That is nutty and those who do so are putting themselves out there as unhinged.

I've never, never read anything on Leftie blogs about assassination for Bush. And I visit them quite often.

I did say that it is wrong for both Left and Right to get to that point in political discussion--well, actually, those aren't discussion so much as rants and crazy talk.

Obama has set the tone already. Lively, spirited debate and argument, even some clever sarcasm is all fair. But let's stay away from calling for politicians' deaths. Or worse.

:-)

dmarks said...

@shaw: "How can you say there's nothing wrong with calling for impeachment BEFORE Obama's even in office????"

I don't agree with it. But it is not in the remotest stretch any call for violence or any sort of related behavior.

Anonymous said...

dmarks typed:

'I also remember a few years ago (probably during the heat of the vs Kerry campaign) there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush. Not a lot, not everywhere, but even if it appears a few places, it is too much.'

Where and when?

Come on.

Show us an example of a post from a 'liberal blog' sympathetic to assassinating George Bush circa 2000.

Anonymous said...

Sorry. Typo.

Circa 2004.

dmarks said...

I did not save the links. It was 4 or 5 years ago. Around the time that someone came out with a movie about the subject

As I said, it was not a lot of it.

"Come on". You know as well as I do that unreasonable extremes exist among liberals, as well as conservatives.

Anonymous said...

Of course you didn't save the links dmark. There weren't any. Your casual libels are absurd.

And endless.

You don't even get an 'attaboy' for the unremarkable observation that 'unreasonable extremists' exist on 'both 'sides'.

No kidding.

The Griper said...

arthurstone, start eating your words.

around April, 2005
here is an example
“For Gods Sake, Kill Bush, Save the United States and the Rest of the World."

another one:
"“Dear Tom DeLay, Please Commit Suicide. Sincerely, Everyone.”

those words were on shirts being sold.

a couple of more:
The same left-wing inhumanity was on display last year when [Democratic Senator] Hillary Clinton spoke at the pro-abortion ‘March for Women’s Lives.‘…

[P]lacards held by the marchers read:
‘If Only Barbara Bush Had Choice;’ ‘Barbara Bush Chose Poorly;’
and
‘The Pope’s Mother Had No Choice.’

want more? here it is:

UK Newspaper calls for Bush assassination

"On November 2, the entire civilised world will be praying, praying Bush loses. And Sod's law dictates he'll probably win, thereby disproving the existence of God once and for all. The world will endure four more years of idiocy, arrogance and unwarranted bloodshed, with no benevolent deity to watch over and save us. John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, John Hinckley Jr - where are you now that we need you?"

http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguide/...1333748,00.html

i believe dmarks is due an apology for telling the truth huh?

dmarks said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
dmarks said...

@arthurstone: "Of course you didn't save the links dmark. There weren't any. Your casual libels are absurd. "

You are lying, plain and simple. You can't see past your one-sided partisan lens. You are also one of the more stupid commenters to actually expect someone to save a link to every single blog post they ever read. Did honestly even look at how moronic this last comment was before you posted it?

You simply have no evidence to back up your accusation of endless libel. You are just making stuff up.

The Griper: Thanks for doing this. It took just a little bit of Googling. Arthurstone would have done this if he was not given to fictional reality-free comments.
-------------

Arthurstone, you are not even consistent. You call my truthful claim that there were some liberal bloggers who supported the idea of assassinating Bush "libel", but later you call it "unremarkable" in the framework if my statement that there are extremists like this on both sides.

Your comments on this post are a big "whoops".

Patrick M said...

And all I had to add was this is that Obama certainly can't be equal Hercules. We've seen his shirtless pic, and he's WAAAAAY too scrawny.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Griper for your input. Not what we're looking for but thanks anyway.

Now dmark back to YOUR original remark:

'I also remember a few years ago (probably during the heat of the vs Kerry campaign) there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush.'

An example please of 'liberal blogs' sympathetic to the idea of assassinating President Bush.

One will do.

dmarks said...

Arthurstone: Scroll up. Didn't you see? Griper found some examples. And they were much worse than what I remembered.

Not only is it what we were looking for, it is worse.

You are digging yourself into a deeper hole on this.

Anonymous said...

dmarks typed:

'Arthurstone: Scroll up. Didn't you see? Griper found some examples. And they were much worse than what I remembered.'

Memory is such a delicate thing isn't it? Griper typed some unsourced stuff which has no bearing on your statement.

I asked you for one example of a 'liberal blogger' encouraging the assassination of GWB.

Hullaballoo? Crooks and Liars? Firedog Lake? Talking Points Memo? Andrew Sullivan? Salon?Where?

Dig away.

dmarks said...

Again, scroll up. Griper already provided it.

It is all sourced, because in the cases where he did not provide a direct link (such as the Guardian one), you can cut and paste his quoted phrases into Google and find multiple sources for them.

It took me 3 seconds to do this. I recommend learning to use search engines to find where things occur on the World Wide Web. You might find it to be a useful skill sometime. Since you say Griper's proof was all "unsourced", I am beginning to think that you are incapable of recognizing actual web links too.

What's that sound? You are digging yourself all the way to China on this one. Dig away indeed.

Memory is such a delicate thing. I think you have forgotten what you originally said, and no amount of proof of at least a few liberals calling for the death of Bush will assuage you. You lost on that point, and now we can all but wonder what point you are trying to prove.

You've certainly now proven that you have no skills of using search engines to find phrases, or even to follow an explicit URL that points to a newspaper site.

Anonymous said...

Not a single example of a 'sympathy of a liberal blogs for the idea to assassinate GWB'.

Surprise.

Bye the bye. Gripers link to the Guardian doesn't work. Cut & paste it yourself.

Another surprise.

Any link to Roger Clinton's alleged remark?

dmarks said...

There are many examples of such sympathy. So easy to find. It took me 3 seconds to find the Guardian page.

I'd give you a link to Google so you can use it for your research, but at this point I'd suspect that you'd be unable to even find Google's page. I think you are content to deny what you know is true and hide behind claims of a complete lack of Internet skills.

Roger Clinton's remark is actual, not alleged. Do some research.

The Griper said...

dmarks said;
I also remember a few years ago (probably during the heat of the vs Kerry campaign) there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush. Not a lot, not everywhere, but even if it appears a few places, it is too much.

arthurstone said;
"Show us an example of a post from a 'liberal blog' sympathetic to assassinating George Bush circa 2000."

arthurstone, nice try at taking dmarks statement out of context. all it does is make you look rediculous.

he never said it was a "post". he only said he saw it on some liberal blogs. that could mean in comments of a blog or stores run by a liberal or anywhere else on a liberal blog.

and any blogs that showed or advocated for the death of Bush would be removed as was the tshirt site by the domain owner for violation of its terms. so your accusation that there was none is a baseless defense.

any evidence of it would have to come from a third party as i found them or who presented them.

Anonymous said...

dmarks typed:

I also remember a few years ago (probably during the heat of the vs Kerry campaign) there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush.

I typed:

Where and when?

Come on.

Show us an example of a post from a 'liberal blog' sympathetic to assassinating George Bush circa 2000 sic 2005.

the griper typed:

arthurstone, nice try at taking dmarks statement out of context. all it does is make you look rediculous.(sic)

Out of context?

Not even close.

A simple question really Griper.

Any 'sympathy' would have done and dmarks still has provided not a single example from any 'liberal blogs' whatever. As it is this is a drive by smear of roughly half the population of the United States.

Of course there are nutbars of various stripes wishing all sorts of public figures ill. But dmarks and you yourself have done nothing at all to indicate such sympathies are those of the operators of 'liberal blogs'.

And try as you may the feeble (Coulteresque? 'Muslims, 'the are savages, I want to kill them all') stab at irony by the Guardian columnist is hardly a call to assassinate GWB. Even you know that.

dmarks said...

I did not provide the links. Griper did. "Stabs at irony" supporting assassination are still supports of assassination. I am very sure that you are not so generous to right-wing nuts who do the same sort of thing. Not only is there a kook at the Guardian who shows sympathy to the assassination idea, it seems that you are now saying that it is OK to "ironically" suggest Bush's assassination.

Brooker's support for assassinating Bush fits perfectly with my claim of "there was some sympathy on liberal blogs for the idea of assassinating President Bush".

"As it is this is a drive by smear of roughly half the population of the United States."

Not even close. You really aren't reading anything, are you? Your above statement is false in multiple ways.

1) It is a fact, not a smear.

2) It involves a few fringe nuts, not the entire liberal movement. Or even a group of any significant size in the liberal movement.You are basically lying by saying that I am speaking of half of the population when I condemn the few fringe pro-assassination kooks.

As you say, "Of course there are nutbars of various stripes wishing all sorts of public figures ill." Your own argument supports the idea that there are a few extreme "nutbars" among the millions of liberal bloggers and opiners

Yet, the main thrust of your argument appears to be that such nutbars do not exist on the left.

And what does this make those who say that it is OK for the nutbars to suggest assassination?

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