Paul Revere by Cyrus Dallin, North End, Boston



Thursday, May 17, 2018

Word play from the Washington Post

A change of pace from the daily horror stories coming out of the Trump administration.

The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. 

 And the winners are: 

 1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.  

2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained. 

 3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. 

 4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk. 

 5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.

 6. Negligent, adj. Absent mindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown. 

 7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp. 

 8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash. 

 9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller. 

10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline. 

 11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam. 

 12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists. 

 13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist. 

 14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms. 

 15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there. 

 16. Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

Fellow blogger Infidel753 has a different take on word play. What if words actually meant what they spelled?


Dave Miller said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
skudrunner said...

Of course it would be because of what religion it pokes fun at. What I am amazed at is why you say you are religious and your charity is faith based. Is it because the money you receive is donated as a tax write off like the clinton foundation.

Dave Miller said...

Yes Skud, that’s it exactly.

If you only knew. The great majority of the money we receive comes from people who will never get a tax break. We’re a Christian group because of our belief in Jesus, nothing more, nothing less. Our work in Mexico is our way of serving the “least of these” in the area we believe God had called us.

As for the joke, I liked the wordplay... nothing more, nothing less. But I can see you point. Sometimes we all have blind spots.

skudrunner said...

Rev, Thanks for clearing that up. I don't think any charitable donation should have tax advantages. If you are going to give, then give. The division between church and state is so gray that it doesn't exist.